LIVING IN THE LIGHT OF GOD (Yvonne—My One and Only Beloved)
By: Yvonne Lai
When I think of this subject, there are two hymns that come to my mind. The first is ‘God’s Way is the Best Way’:
God’s way is the best way, though I may not see it.
Why sorrows and trials often gather around me,
He is always seeking my gold to refine.
So, humbly I trust Him, my Saviour divine.
God’s way is the best way. I will trust Him always;
He knows best.
When I was eighteen years old, I dedicated myself to the Lord during a devotional meeting. I wanted to walk with God like Enoch in the Old Testament. In the prayer I visualized myself like a little child, standing in front of the Lord, willing to be used by Him. I was nothing in front of my Mighty God. But I was sure He would use me if I committed my life to Him. With simple faith, I did so and submitted myself to His will. When I was twenty-two, God’s calling was once again upon me. Through my daily devotion one day, He called me to make a step of faith to offer myself to be a servant of God. I accepted this calling right away, like Moses leading the Israelites out of Egypt in front of the Red Sea. He made a leap of faith to step into the Red Sea. God accomplished great things through him.
Our God is a great God. He is faithful. He has led me all these years. I married a pastor, and we have served faithfully together in churches since 1973. It pays to serve Jesus every day. Many people get blessings from the Lord through our serving. In life we face uncertainties, difficulties and hardships but nothing can separate us from the love of God. During the last thirty years of serving, God’s presence in me is constant. He strengthens me when I am weak. He comforts me when I’m hurt. He makes His face shine upon me.
After the birth of my second child, I became sick with rheumatoid arthritis, a disease that is chronic and crippling. The specialists told me that I would suffer “until the day I die.”
Who could I turn to? No one could help me, not even my dear husband. “Turn your eye upon Jesus.” God used this hymn to remind me again to make another step of faith to trust him, he can “make me whole.” My younger son has grown up now. On his twenty-fifth birthday, I reflected on my journey accompanied with sickness. The disease has gradually taken away my independence. I went through ten joint replacements/operations. Hospitals had become my second home. But one thing in me was whole: my soul. There is no bitterness, no sorrow, no complaints, but there is praise. The Lord makes his face shine upon me. My heart is always filled with love, joy and peace.
This is the second hymn: “Peace Like a River Filled My Soul.”
When peace like a river attends my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll.
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say:
It is well with my soul.
Romans 8:35
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
In 1997, my husband, Reverend Paul Lai, was diagnosed with Nasal Laryngal Carcinoma. The news came to us so suddenly that we panicked the first few days. I still remember the night we received the terrifying news from the family doctor. Despite the panic, the whole family worshipped together: “I surrender to you, Lord, and I’m willing to submit myself to your will in my life.” That was my prayer. As you all know, I depend almost completely on my husband to help me with my daily living, such as cooking, dressing, cleaning, etc. What could I do without him? Why was this happening to him, the main support of the family? There were many questions to ask. The Lord gave us the bible verse Hebrews 4:14-16 to comfort us and to remind us of His faithfulness, love and care. Again, peace came to our hearts. A series of tests and treatments followed, including undergoing radiation therapy thirty five times. The radiation started on December 3rd 1997, with five treatments a week.
On January 25th, 1998, my heart was filled with the glory of God as my husband dropped me off at the rehabilitation centre (where I was hospitalized for an ankle surgery). I knew right at that moment that my husband was totally healed by God. I could hardly wait for him to drive back so I could phone him of this good news from the Lord. “Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice.” The Lord is so good to the ones who fear and submit to Him.
(The next was written in September 2003):
In August 2003, I started to feel very tired and lose my appetite. During the following few days, I noticed that both my eyes were becoming yellow. My urine was yellow as well. I also started to get indigestion so I went to see my family doctor right away. A series of tests followed: blood tests, urine tests, ultra sounds, etc. “Your bile tube is inflamed and stacked; it could be very serious” said the doctor, “We have to send you to the hospital for some other internal tests.”
“Oh, Lord, do I have to suffer again?!” I asked the Lord to heal me by His power. I told the doctor to give me time to let my body heal by itself. He told me that I was stubborn. I lost ten pounds in one week. With much prayer, I started to be able to eat a bit each day. I knew God could heal me and He did. Now it is a month later and I can eat normally. It’s time to go back for a retest. By faith, I know that I’m healed. Praise be the name of the Lord. He performed miracles in the past; He can perform them today. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Jesus is the same. Things on earth may change, but never Jesus! Glory to His name.